ATTN. Men! I’m sure you’re aware of these new gladiator sandals that women are wearing. Your girlfriend or wife probably owns a pair and I’m sure you have wanted to ask her, “Why the fuck are you wearing sandals that Leonidas wore in Sparta?” But you just let it slide because you know how sensitive they are and you don’t want to start a Holy war. Big Dave thinks we should start a Holy war. He is under the impression that this stupid little fad is the tip of the iceberg. Think about it, most men probably sit there with their mouths shut as their women parades around in these hideous sandals. The women are probably thinking, “Hmmm…If I can get away wearing these Gladiator Man sandals, what else can I get away with? Maybe I don’t have to shave my legs anymore. Maybe I don’t have to wear G-strings anymore or maybe I can become a fat ass.” So speak up you dumb fucks! Next time your girl comes out of the room and asks you how she looks – tell her she looks like a Gladiator and all she needs is a sword and a fucking shield to make it official.
Let us ban together and stop these women from wearing ugly shit. Women use to want to impress men with the clothes they wore. Do you think tight mini-skirts and 6 inch heels are comfortable? Hell No! They only wore this because they wanted to get our attention. We took this hooker phase for granted. As men we should have been complimenting them every minute because, now look what they are wearing. If you need a reminder of how good we once had it – let Big Dave remind you.
Women use to wear Rocketdogs .
Women use to match their bras and panties. (Nowadays we just hope we don’t get one of those ugly beige looking bras.)
Women took the time to wear makeup. (Now they just wear those huge sun glasses to cover up their ugly faces.)
Women wore mini skirts. (What the Hell happened to Mini Skirts?)
Women wore white Tank Tops –
Women’s G-strings use to show.
Women use to wear these pants that made any ass look good.
And these cotton shorts that they all use to wear…
Men let us ban together and put an end to this Gladiator fad and bring back the Hooker fad. Because the last time I checked this isn’t aincent Rome. This is America and in America our women are supposed to look like hookers.